Bad Idea: Not Trading in Trade

Bad Idea Fridays are dedicated to the idea that if you’re going to do something (no matter how ill advised), it’s best to do it properly. Any and all consequences of following the advice in this article can be blamed on Poras.

Trade Channel is a chat channel in World of Warcraft designed so players may buy and sell items and services they have or want.  Or just whatever you feel like.  You know.  It’s not like there are chat rules or anything.

Think the President is sucking it up?  Tell Trade about how he’s subverting the American government, making a mockery of the Constitution, and plotting a Communist take-over of all the businesses ever.  There are people out there who are like-minded, and need to know the information you know!  Something has to be done about this!  You, as the only one in the entire world with this valuable knowledge, must share it with as many people as you can before it’s too late.  Ignore those other people that tell you to put a sock in it, or that they’ve reported you to a GM for spamming chat!  They are brainwashed and will later have to be re-educated once you’ve saved America!  Anyone else not from America can get out! [Keep starting political arguments, they really mean something in a video game.]

Do you know why they call it an XBOX 360? You know, you clever dog you.  Why don’t you ask Trade?  They’ll love to hear your hilariously clever reason why.  They must be so jealous of your rapier wit.  Look at them laughing about how your joke doesn’t make any sense.  What a bunch of inbred swines.  They can’t even appreciate good humor.  And Arthas’ mount Invincible?  Clearly visible.  Why doesn’t anyone realize how stupid that name is?  Goodness! [This is called trolling, and if I see you doing it, you will be immediately ignored.  I have ZERO tolerance for your fuckery.  None.  Grow up.]

Missing someone from your OS3D raid?  Need a Tank?  Determined to not stop looking until you find one?  Trade is the place to go!  This channel spans a whopping four Capitol cities (eight, counting enemy cities) so almost everyone can see what you need to complete your raid group.  Make sure your message doesn’t get bumped off the screen, and clean some of that other chat-clutter away by making your LFG Macro as big as you can, with as many capital letters as you can so no one misses it.  Who cares if that guy needs an Enchanter to buff up his new gear?  YOU NEED YOUR RESERVED TWILIGHT DRAKE.  Don’t let them know that, though.  Wouldn’t want to scare away potential group members! [TRADE IS NOT LFG GET OUT.]

Are you looking to start a new guild, and need some signatures for your charter?  Well since so many people can see Trade at once, why not ask there for those necessary names?  And once your guild is formed, you can even recruit there, too!  Ensure that you make your message as detailed as possible, including your guild name surrounded by some fancy symbols, like musical notes, hearts, or raid targets like SKULLS, so they know how scary and powerful your guild is! Along with your guild name should be what you want to focus on, like Raiding, RP, PvP, or anything else you think you might ever do while in your guild.  If you have to make a second macro because you filled the first one, that’s okay!  People will know that if you’re willing to put in the extra effort to make two whole buttons to advertise about your guilds recruitment status, it must be an awesome guild.  If someone else uses their own recruitment macro, make sure yours knocks theirs out of the chat frame, cause you don’t want all the good players joining their stupid guild.  Your guild name is <XxDËTHSTRÏKËRZxX> and is definitely better than theirs.  It doesn’t even have X’s in it, and that means they are not hardcore.


About Tyko

I play WoW, EvE Online, and Minecraft. And Pokémon. I enjoy burritos, pizza, french fries, and spicy chicken sandwiches. I'm a Libra. I am creepy more often than not. I'm an elitist at heart. Fear is the mind-killer.
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One Response to Bad Idea: Not Trading in Trade

  1. Capsicum says:

    I thought this was a “Bad Idea” post.. not helpful tips and tricks. Anyway I’m off to troll trade for a bit.

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